Blog

Number 189

After attending a California conference of high achieving women, journalist Pamela Ryckman started to notice that women of all ages are creating semi-formal professional networks. She began to discover a wide mix of women’s dining clubs and other groups, particularly in New York and California. She followed the trail to more cities and the result is her new book, Stiletto Network: Inside the Women's Power Circles That Are Changing the Face of Business.

“I started to discover dinner groups and salons and coworking and networking circles in major cities across the United States. In almost every case, the women thought they were alone in assembling clusters of dear, smart girlfriends who met regularly to learn and share,” Ryckman says. But in fact there are so many groups it’s starting to look like a movement.

I don’t think the phenomenon of women’s support circles is as new as Ryckman suggests, but I enjoyed her description of how the tide of female power groups is rising. “They talk nonstop about business. And while their companies pan the industries – from finance to real estate to fashion to art – they’re almost all Web-based.” But “it’s not like they’re all work and no play...Never has the Women’s Movement felt less like a jaundiced faction and more like a party.”

Tens of thousands, or maybe hundreds of thousands, of professional women are meeting regularly, reaching across generational and institutional lines, and sharing information, advice and contacts. And the energy and excitement they share seems to be contagious. Ryckman describes woman after woman whose career takes off, with one synchronistic opportunity after another, as a result of her Stiletto Network.

It’s worth noting that these groups are not anti-man. “Networks are meant to extend one’s scope, not restrict it,” Ryckman says. “Savvy gals may unite on occasion, but they don’t cut themselves off from the dudes.” Women want to help each other build rich networks, including with powerful men.

The circles exist to provide peer-to-peer support, and don’t welcome just anybody. Some mentioned by Ryckman have membership policies sounding perhaps too much like the restrictive clubs that served the Old Boy Network. “For Stiletto Networks to be relevant and desirable, they must be rooted in shared experience and true sympathy – which means they must have some form of exclusivity.”

What makes the new groups particularly interesting is the absence of hierarchy and emphasis on collaboration across industries and skill sets. “The horizontal networks women have built over time just happen to be the same networks society now wants and needs.” Ryckman says they are about being “collegial, collaborative, checking your ego at the door, and trying to work on solutions.”

The circles are so varied that your experience may not align with Ryckman’s account of how the women’s network works. But if you’re a woman, I bet her book will make you want to start a group, or tweak the one you already love so it can foster even more career synchronicity.

Ryckman’s tips for starting a Stiletto Network include:

• Think diversity. Don’t just round up your best buddies. Draw women with diverse skills, in different fields.
• Believe in magic. Don’t worry much about the goals or agendas. “If you get dynamic ladies talking or walking or drinking, exciting things will happen.”
• Use technology to facilitate. After the event, share information and continue the conversation through email and social media.
• Systemize “asks and offers.” Women may have trouble asking for help. A process for making requests or offering assistance makes groups more effective.

Number 188

What are the characteristics of celebrities, business leaders and other people who rise to the very top of their chosen fields? Authors Camille Sweeney and Josh Gosfield explored this question in their intriguing book, "The Art of Doing – How Superachievers Do What They Do and How They Do It So Well."

Last week in Wisconsin, the authors shared key lessons from their research at Conversation Among Masters, a conference of senior executive coaches. Their initial goal was to uncover what makes top achievers unique. But after months of interviews with a broad mix of highly successful people, what they found most interesting is that these extraordinary folks share many core principles and practices.

Sweeney, a journalist, and Gosfield, an artist were not steeped in the science of success when they began their project. They started without preconceptions and created an anecdotal portrait of what it takes to reach a professional pinnacle. The CAM audience was enthralled by what the pair found, because their conclusions echo basic principles shaping the rapidly growing coaching profession. Here are two of the 10 most important strategies the authors noticed among people who vault above others in their fields:

Super achievers are active listeners. “Enough about me. Let’s talk about you. What do you think of me?” That’s a classic line from poor listeners, say the authors. But the people they interviewed, although highly focused and hardworking, tend to be terrific listeners. “Every one of them credits listening as an important aspect of their work. Some use it to validate others, but they all listen to learn.” Among the interviewees who understand listening are:

• Erin Gruwell was an idealistic white student teacher who hoped to make a difference with her mixed-race high school class of remedial students in Long Beach, California. At first she was shocked by the students’ hostile response to her efforts, but her anger shifted to empathy as she listened to their harrowing stories of growing up amidst violence. She found new ways to teach through active listening, and went on to create the Freedom Writers Teacher Institute to teach educators to “become a student of your students.”
• CEO Tony Hsieh asked employees: what values should be embraced by on-line apparel retailer Zappos? He listened to their responses and the ensuing dialogue eventually shaped the company’s culture. And listening is key to Zappos’ approach to customer service. “We make an emotional connection person to person, one interaction at a time,” Hsieh said.
• Randall Grahm makes great wine by hearing in ways that don’t involve actual sound. This visionary vintner “listens to the land” when deciding which varieties of grapes to grow at his Bonny Doon vineyard. He says by reaching the right level of relaxation and attention it’s possible to “participate in the intelligence of nature itself.”

Number 187

The professional world is changing so quickly that your next career may be in a field that has yet to be invented. One of the ways you can prepare for future career challenges is to start now to build up your leadership brand.

Your leadership brand sets you apart from the competition. It reflects both who you are and what other people think you can accomplish. It’s a measure of your personal strength and professional ability, and says something about your likelihood of success in a challenging situation.

To build your brand, identify the personal qualities you want to be known for. Then take steps to develop those qualities. This process can help you define and live your brand:

Step one: create your leadership vision.
Your leadership vision summarizes the personal qualities you want to bring to your professional life. It’s a list of the leadership characteristics you want to demonstrate and be known for.

It’s worth taking some time to identify the leadership qualities that truly matter to you. Here are three steps that can help you craft a list that feels authentic:

• Notice brands you love. Think of several consumer brands you trust and would recommend to a friend. For each one ask yourself: what makes this brand great? For example, I am a Starbucks fan, although their coffee isn’t my favorite. What I love is that Starbucks is reliable, friendly and generous with perks like WiFi and comfortable seating. So I would list qualities like consistency, friendliness and generosity. Consider which of these brand qualities you would like to have reflected in your reputation as a leader.
• Think about leaders you admire. List five leaders who have influenced you, whether they were teachers, colleagues or historic figures. Then list their important personal characteristics. Here are words and phrases many people use in describing leaders they admire:
  • Positive
  • Supportive and empowering of others
  • Self aware
  • Reliable
  • Organized
  • Always learning and growing
• Ask yourself. Imagine that several of your colleagues are talking about the quality of your work and the kind of contributions you’re making on a project. What would you like to hear them saying about you? Add those words to your list.

Step two: study your list.
When you have a list of the leadership qualities you want to be known for, post it in a conspicuous place. And carry around a copy. Look at your list frequently, including each morning. When you’re faced with a challenge or decision, imagine leaders with these same qualities and ask: what would they do?

Step three: build new habits.
A key to building your brand is practicing the kind of behaviors that will earn the reputation you want. Each month, pick a characteristic to work on. Think of a specific behavioral change that would demonstrate or bolster that characteristic. For example, if you want to build a better reputation for reliability, create a new practice of arriving at every meeting on time. It will be easier to build a new habit if you keep track of your performance. So make a log of every meeting in the month and note whether you were on time. Be precise. If you were late, say by how many minutes.