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Dear Friends and Clients,

I once was a client of a law firm where two of the key partners seemed locked in an endless battle. When they were together they bickered like an unhappily married couple, and when they were apart each took every opportunity to undercut the other.

Sometimes the feuding pair seemed to actually enjoy the quarrel, but the impact on the firm's effectiveness was devastating. It wasted partners' energy, and frequently left associates and staff in a state of uncertainty. Despite the firm's considerable expertise, I pulled our business because the toxic atmosphere sapped my energy instead of supporting our productivity.

Law firms' highly competitive environments can stimulate hard work and creativity. But when the competitive spirit is allowed to deteriorate into personal conflict, everybody may lose.

Managing conflict in the workplace is a challenge that many leaders face. But knowing how to transform conflict into an atmosphere of achievement is a skill that we all could use. And that is what I'll discuss in this issue.

Warm wishes,
Bev


A Few Simple Techniques
Can Help You Manage or Avoid
Workplace Conflicts

February 20th, 2007 * Number 54

Workplaces today may incorporate wonderful diversity. Globalization means that even small organizations may have employees drawn from diverse ethnic, religious, and social groups.

At the same time, the rapid change that characterizes much of our economy is giving rise to extraordinary innovation. Employees at all levels have new opportunities, as well as new ways of doing things.

Diversity and innovation can invigorate our institutions, but they also hold the potential to drive people apart. Differences in training, culture, values and language can spawn quiet or active conflict among colleagues who would be better served by working together.

At every level of our organizations, there is a great need for people who can lead across boundaries. We all are challenged to resist divisive rhetoric and transform differences into opportunities. If you are looking for ways to address conflicts in your work life, here are techniques to consider:

  • Focus on the big picture. When conflict begins, the best thing may be to delay action and concentrate on understanding the whole picture. You may make a contribution simply by understanding everybody's viewpoint, and seeing how all the pieces come together. Or you may lower the tension by drawing combatants' attention to a shared mission.

  • Be present. When you are fully present, you are calm and observant, and completely mindful of the situation at hand. Great leaders like Nelson Mandela have been able to quiet intense conflict simply by being present. We all have the power to soothe conflict by cultivating our inner calm as we step forward to witness the forces that drive others apart.

  • Inquire. The best way to diffuse conflict may be to ask questions, rather than offer advice. Ask respectful, positively worded questions truly designed to elicit information and others' views. Listen deeply to the answers, and don't rush to offer your own opinions or suggestions.

  • Redefine “us.” Office politics, like politics everywhere, may break down into petty warfare between “us” and “them.” If our view of “us” is narrowly defined, we may waste time and energy sniping at all the others we regard as “them.” But if “us” is broadened to include our whole organization, the “we/they” dichotomy will be dispelled, and we won't waste our energy fighting with colleagues from down the hall or across the country.

  • Build bridges. You can overcome “us/them” distinctions by encouraging and forging relationships that cut across boundaries. Bridging can be encouraged by creation of inter-departmental teams, by broadly attended social events, and even by office architecture that fosters mingling.

  • Model trust. Trust is at the heart of successful collaboration and conflicts are less likely to arise in environments where people trust each other. You can support a climate of trust by demonstrating your willingness to trust other people, even before they have earned it. Studies suggest that building trust is a skill shared by many exemplary leaders, and also that people who are trusting are more likely to be happy and well adjusted.

    • Want to Read More About
    Transforming Conflict?

    Below is a brief book description, as well as a link that will allow you to buy the book directly from Amazon.com. For reviews of other helpful books, along with Amazon links, go to: ClearWays Books and Services. If you buy a book this way it will contribute to the cost of distributing Bev’s Tips, and be much appreciated.

    Leading Through Conflict, by Mark Gerzon, 2006.

    Mediation expert Gerzon argues that a primary challenge for today's leaders is to transform conflict into opportunity. Conflict characterizes modern life and yet, he says, the tools for dealing with conflict are seldom taught.

    He suggests that leaders take up tools used by mediators, such as:

    • Integral vision, in which we hold all sides of a conflict in our minds and hearts;
    • Presence, where we apply all our mental, emotional and spiritual resources to witnessing the conflict;
    • Bridging, where we create partnerships and alliances that cross the divisions within an organization or community; and
    • Dialogue, in which communication allows us to foster bridging and innovation.
    Gerzon's concept of “mediating leadership” has great appeal in a world that would benefit if divisive, defensive posturing were replaced by a greater spirit of collaboration.



    Coaching can foster the growth of leaders. Bev is an executive coach who works with gifted leaders seeking to grow in self-knowledge while seizing opportunities and meeting challenges. She also is available to speak about a broad range of issues related to your work life. Visit her website at www.ClearWaysConsulting.com or email to Bev directly. Bev is certified by the International Coach Federation and associated with Executive Coaching & Consulting Associates.





    Bev’s Tips for a Better Work Life is published on the first and third Tuesday of each month by Beverly Jones, a lawyer and former executive who coaches accomplished leaders and professionals to bring new direction and energy to their work lives.

    Copyright ©2007, ClearWays Consulting, LLC & Beverly E. Jones. All rights in all media reserved. However, the content of Bev’s Tips for a Better Work Life may be forwarded in full without special permission on the condition that (1) it is for non-profit use and (2) full attribution and copyright notice are given. For other uses please contact Bev Jones.

    Our address is: 2925 43rd Street, NW, Washington, DC 20016.