Dear Friends and Clients,

Executives visiting their Congressional delegations may be so focused on what they want to say that they forget that other key to communication: listening.  Some CEOs argue their points so relentlessly that they undercut their case by missing critical feedback from the lawmakers.

As a lawyer/lobbyist, I learned to set up successful Capitol Hill meetings by giving “listening assignments” to the visiting execs.  “We need your expertise,” I’d say, “to help us understand where the Senator is coming from on this point.”

Warmly, Bev

Listen Up!
Become More Productive
By Polishing Your
Listening Skills

• Takes in information efficiently, avoiding miscommunication and misunderstandings;
  
  
• Is perceived as a strong communicator; and
  
  
• Shows respect for clients and employees, creating an atmosphere of trust.

• Tune out, becoming easily bored or distracted;
  
  
• Flare up, feeling frequent flashes of frustration, anger or other emotion;
  
  
• Self talk, tending to drown out other speakers with the commentary inside your own head; or
  
  
• Fake it, routinely pretending to listen while actually thinking about something else, like what you want to say next.

• Write it down.  If listening during meetings is a challenge, try taking notes, summarizing the main points as you go along.
  
  
• Clarify.  Summarizing techniques can work in conversation as well as in conference rooms.  Restate the main points, letting the speaker know what you heard, and inviting correction or refinement.
  
  
• Ask questions.  Framing your question will help you focus on the message and asking good questions will let the speaker know that you’re paying attention. 
  
  
• Practice.  Listening is an active process.  It takes focus and energy, but you can get better at it.  One way to improve your skill is to give yourself assignments, like finding out certain kinds of information.  At networking events, for example, commit yourself to learning about the professional activities of at least three people in the room.
  
  
• Journal.  After a conversation is over, write down the speaker’s primary messages and note nonverbal cues as well as your general impressions.
  
  
• Behave like a listener.  When you are practicing being a good listener, make eye contact with the speaker, acknowledge what is said with nods or your expression, and assume a position that is relaxed but respectful.
  
  
• Empathize.  Borrow the Buddhist technique of feeling compassion in your heart. At the start of the conversation, imagine a sensation of love and support in your heart.  Then, project it to the speaker.
  
  
• Listen to yourself.  Your internal dialogue can act as a filter, blocking out news you don’t want to hear or changing facts that don’t match your existing perceptions.  By becoming aware of the commentary in your own head you can learn to let it go, opening the way for new information.  Jotting down recurring phrases – like “the people in this company are idiots” – will help you to become aware of and ultimately to get rid of that limiting self-talk.
  
  
• Breathe.  If you feel negative emotion or annoyance welling up while you’re listening, take a deep breath, focus on the troublesome sensation, and imagine that your continued breathing is allowing it to blow away.